Tuesday, April 14, 2009

This 'N That Tuesday!

Alan Rickman Film Roles

"You know, Alan Rickman could read aloud from the label on a paint can, and at the sound of his voice I'd start peeling my clothes off." - Cherie Priest

"Get back kids, my awesomeness is going consume us all!"

10. Col. Brandon in Sense and Sensibility: Though, perhaps, not the best role, Rickman manages to pull off the quiet, stern, but hopelessly in love Colonel. Added bonus: Golden locks and a uniform!

9. Franz Mesmer in Mesmer: One of his few starring roles, this is...an odd movie. I watched it once, but I wasn't really tempted to watch it again. However, it's one of the few opportunities one has to stare at Alan Rickman for an hour and a half.

8. Alex Hughes in Snowcake: I haven't seen it, but it sounds pretty intense. Rickan's character picks up a hitchhiker, but in an auto accident just outside of where he's to drop her off, she dies in the crash. Stranded in the snowbound town, Rickman visits her mother, Sigourney Weaver, who is a high functioning autistic woman. Bonding ensues.

7. Phil Allen in Blow Dry: I love this movie. I don't know what happened to it. If you borrowed it, I'm going to hunt you down. Anyhoo, Rickman versus Bill Nighy in a hair cutters competition; Rickman has to prove he's still the best and come to terms with his ex-wife (the lovely Natasha Richardson), who ran off with their female model years ago, who is now dying of cancer. Don't worry, it's still mostly funny! He has scissors tattooed on his feet!

6. Alexander Dane in Galaxy Quest: A spoof of the Spock character from Star Trek, Rickman pulls off the classically trained stage actor forced to don the ol' space unitard for cons and do meet-and-greets with NERDS. Oh woe. But then, you know, the aliens and the space battles. And Sigourney Weaver's boobs.

5. Metatron in Dogma: Really, can you imagine someone else as the voice of God?

4. Marvin, the Paranoid Android in Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: This was really inspired voice-casting for the perpetually depressed android with a constant pain down the diodes of his left leg. 30 billion times smarter than a live mattress and the ability to make any computer he's hooked up to commit suicide.

3. Sheriff of Nottingham in Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves: Alan Rickman is probably the only reason to watch this movie, FROM THE DIRECTOR OF THE ACADEMY AWARD WINNING DANCES WITH WOLVES AND STAR OF THE POSTMAN. That and the bitchin' Bryan Adams soundtrack!

2. Severus Snape in the Harry Potter series: Rickman is more Snape than Snape in the book is. If you were to compare, Rickman plays Snape with a bit more reserve, and quiet, seething hatred than in the book. He has this fabulous tick, where he cocks his head slightly to the side and looks like a bird studying your moves, deciding whether or not to swoop down and take you home for dinner (the black contact lenses really help). Unfortunately, we haven't really gotten into the Snape character in the first four or five movies, but since he plays such a prominent role in the next three, I'm really looking forward to watching the Snape character develop. Not to mention he looks so at home in black robes.

1. Hans Gruber in Die Hard: I could watch this movie over and over. Bruce Willis is fantastic, but Rickman really makes it worth it. Don't argue. Yippee-kay Yay.

Coming soon: The Caterpillar in Alice in Wonderland: Okay, cheating. This movie hasn't come out yet. HOWEVER, I shamelessly admit loving all things Tim Burton, and methinks that this character will be a certain favorite. Don't worry, I don't own any Burton-themed clothing or handbags, but I do have an odd attraction to claymation.

1 comment:

  1. You can't list a role if you haven't watched the movie! Don't cross streams.